By signing up, you will receive our newsletter with articles, videos, health tips and more. While overthinking is often a sign that you're probably not as happy and fulfilled as you could be, sometimes overthinking can actually be a way of managing overwhelming feelings. The more time you allow yourself to think through a decision, the likelier you are to overanalyze it. How have you been lately? The act of overthinking can be linked to psychological problems such as anxiety and depression, although it's hard to know which happens first in each individual. Research has found that co-rumination excessive discussion and rehashing of problems among friends can actually make anxiety worse. van Randenborgh, A., de JongMeyer, R., & Hffmeier, J. Get the help you need from a therapist near youa FREE service from Psychology Today. (2006). Uncertainty was my only certainty. At times, you obsess about or over-analyze your day-to-day experiences and interactions with people. While everyone overthinks things once in a while, some people just cant ever seem to quiet the constant barrage of thoughts. (2020). Experts call this overthinking. Our brain can become stuck in an up-regulated fight-flight-freeze mode and continue scanning for threats or even perceived threats, Foley says. If youre an overthinker, you likely already know you cant sleep when your mind wont shut off. Dattilo recommends placing any thoughts you're having on the back burner and focusing on your body. You recognize the problem at the root of your overthinking and make a game-plan to proactively solve this problem. You just cant stop thinking about an event, a person, something that happened in the past, or on a problem. Chapter 10 - Sleep and repetitive thought: The role of rumination and worry in sleep disturbance. I am not going to believe everything I think and am going to strive to be perpetually curious. Rumination. I know I should not have said that. It's about us. Teaching and Learning in Higher Education. Deliberation is an admirable and essential leadership quality that undoubtedly produces better outcomes. To escape that distress, many overthinkers resort to unhealthy coping strategies, such as alcohol or food. You worry about past mistakes or current problems and issues, and how they might lead to negative outcomes. ), 5 Things to Remember When You Start Worrying, negativity can arise with certain thoughts, He said he loved me and woke up one day feeling confused. If someone you know does something you consider hurtful, but you dont discuss the issue with the person, negativity can arise with certain thoughts about why the person acted that way. 34 Quotes That Will Help You to Stop Overthinking. Worry and anxiety: is there a causal relationship?. 2012). But if you are struggling to overcome your overthinking, or your overthinking might be contributing to the mental health issues I mentioned like anxiety or depression, it might be worth considering seeing a mental health professional who specializes in an evidence-based practice like cognitive-behavioral therapy. So, what sorts of things do we tend to overthink about? You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. Anxiety and depression come with physical symptoms, too, including: "What's more is that generalized anxiety disorder is linked to high blood pressure and poor cardiovascular health, while depression can increase your risk of heart attack and suicide," warns Dr. Fowler. You will rest happily knowing you lived true to yourself, acted with confidence, and stood up for what you believed in. By clicking Accept, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. If youre struggling with overthinking, you may feel stuck or unable to take any action at all. Mar 14, 2016 Florida State University To The Girl Who Overthinks Everything, I'm sure you are overthinking right now as to why you clicked on this letter. Putting an end to rehashing, second-guessing, and catastrophic predictions is easier said than done. Trying to weigh every possible outcome and consideration is paralyzing. What holds us back from thinking critically in day-to-day situations? 6. Thinking has, many a time, made me sad, darling; but doing never did in all my life.My precept is, do something, my sister, do good if you can; but at any rate, do something. ~Elizabeth Gaskell. Anxious distress is not the same as having an anxiety disorder along with major depressive disorder. Beware of these negative thoughts and consider working towards letting them go. Calm Down the Nonstop Chatter of Your Mind. Not one day can be fruitful if more time than necessary is allowed for aimless thinking. But even better than that is getting a fresh, new angle on the topic. Reactive avoidance is the real enemy, not anxiety. Here are a few simple things you can do to free yourself from this habit. So if you notice that you are stuck thinking about the same issue over and over again but are not coming to any sort of solution, you may be overthinking. This mind loop can be exhausting, painful and frustrating. Thinking has allowed us to create complex societies and develop as a species over time. When you catch yourself ruminating, think about the time and energy your are wasting, and about the opportunities you are letting disappear. Is your impression correct? But chronic overthinking can start to interrupt your sleep, work, relationships, health, and other aspects of your everyday life. Choi, K. W., et al. But once you can pinpoint which thoughts are causing the upset, one golden question will release all negativity: Can I be 100 percent sure this is true?. For immediate assistance, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988, or text HOME to 741-741 to reach the Crisis Text Line. Here are few quotes about the topic of the article. As difficult as it might seem, dont take too much time making up your mind, especially with unimportant matters. What I came to learn truly changed my life. Trying to put together pieces, imagining what could have been, should have been or would have been. Youre more likely to overthink when youre drained, so the more you can eliminate minor decisions, the more energy youll have for ones that really matter. Why zebras don't get ulcers: The acclaimed guide to stress, stress-related diseases, and coping. Someone with depression, by nature of their illness, may lack hope that theyll ever feel better. As soon as you notice you're "in your head" about something, ask yourself if your thoughts can be made more constructive towards making a decision or finding a solution. You make me enjoy life. Its easy to get carried away with negative thoughts. The first time a true bout of over-thinking grappled me was when I graduated from college. Exercise may help with chronic overthinking, too. Do you wish to free your mind from endless thinking? Thinking too much: Rumination and psychopathology. Michelle P. Maidenberg, Ph.D., MPH, LCSW-R, CGP maintains a private practice in Harrison, NY. Intuition works like a mental pattern matching game. Headaches. Build Mental Toughness, Bet in Slow Thinking and Declutter & Unfu*k Your Mind from Stress Eating & Drinking, Get Out of Your Head: Stopping the Spiral of Toxic Thoughts, Unfu*k Yourself: Get Out of Your Head and into Your Life, Stop Worrying: 10 Ways to Put an End to Worry, How to Live in the Moment: 14 Tips for Staying Present, Self-Compassion: Definition, Examples, and Exercises, How to Be More Confident: 15 Science-Based Tips, Exercises, &Confidence-Boosters, The effect of worry and rumination on affect states and cognitive activity, Responses to depression and their effects on the duration of depressive episodes. This makes a lot of sense. Thinking about how you could do things differently or recognizing potential pitfalls to a plan, for example, can help you do better in the future. Studies confirm this, finding that rumination and worry lead to fewer hours of sleep and poorer sleep quality. They might need constant reassurance that you aren't going anywhere. At times, when something bad happens, you think about the worst scenarios, with thoughts like what if? or why?. And as your mental health declines, your tendency to ruminate increases, leading to a vicious cycle that is hard to break. For this, you need a level of insight into what each decision will lead to. Merriam-Webster.com " Why did I say that? too. "It's best to be proactive . All the time he was thinking, I was hitting him.". "Healthy distraction can be helpful," says Duke. Our brains have evolved to produce complex thoughts that allow us to understand information, solve problems, plan ahead, and learn from our past. Sleep and repetitive thought: the role of rumination and worry in sleep disturbance. Worry and rumination are two common forms of repetitive negative thinking. Although you have been influenced by so many factors, such as your past experiences, societal pressures, your family of origin, age, race, religion, and so much more, I expect more from you. You can find here, concentration exercise that you can practice to improve your authority over your mind. LinkedIn Image Credit: F8 studio/Shutterstock. Research finds that dwelling on your shortcomings, mistakes, and problems increases your risk of mental health problems. Perfectionists and overachievers have tendencies to overthink because of the fear of failing and the need to be perfect take over, which leads to replaying or criticizing decisions and mistakes, says Hafeez. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC, More from Michelle P. Maidenberg Ph.D., MPH, LCSW-R, CGP. It's ours. When you are overthinking, you are likely trying to solve a problem in your life. But research has found that its often a symptom of other mental health conditions, including: One study found a two-way relationship between overthinking and stress. Rumination. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. What is the neuroscience behind rumination and repetitive thinking? This habit prevents you from taking action. In the short term, having a lot of thoughts about a stressful situation can prompt you to make a move. If you are reading this article, you may have recognized that overthinking is a problem for you and are trying to solve that problem. GET MORE FUN & INSPIRING IMAGES & VIDEOS. That all thoughts and feelings that surface are welcome, from the most comfortable to the most uncomfortable. When you notice yourself replaying events in your mind over and over, or worrying about things you cant control, acknowledge that your thoughts arent productive. Merriam Webster defines this word as: To think too much about something, or to put too much time into thinking about or analyzing something, in a way that is more harmful than helpful. Which decision will have the biggest positive impact on my top priorities? Telling yourself to stop thinking about something can backfire. Perfectionism. Be swift to move forward, even if it is in the wrong direction. Recognizing when this is happening is the first step toward working on it. No more thinking about them. We use cookies on our website to help us improve our site. As a product lead at a major technology company, Terences job is to make decisions. This is a mental habit that wastes your time and energy and prevents you from acting, doing new things and making progress in your life. I thank you for being associated with my brain, my most complex organ, and the physiological part of you. How Following Our Instincts Now Can Protect Us from Pain Down the Line, 7 Comforting Thoughts That Helped Me Build Self-Confidence, How Feeling Out of Control as a Kid Led Me to an Eating Disorder, How I Stopped Feeling Exhausted by Other Peoples Needs and Feelings, Leaving an Abusive Relationship: What Ive Learned and How Ive Moved On. It's the art of creating problems that were never there in the first place. You may have found yourself lying awake at night, unable to stop the train of thoughts running through your mind. Cognitive distortion. How can I do what I want to do with joy? When your final years are approaching, you will not worry about how well you thought through your decisions, or how thoroughly and accurately you approached lifes forks in the road. 2. (n.d.). Ghislain & Marie David de Lossy/Getty Images, Trust Yourself: Stop Overthinking and Channel Your Emotions for Success at Work. Your issue at hand can become so consuming that others may look at you like youre living in your own mental world. We think about what to do, what not to do, and what would be best for us and for everyone around us. One way to avoid overthinking is to focus instead on active solutions. It require practice to stop this habit. But what about the children? This information is for informational purposes only and is not meant to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Do people often tell you youre worrying or thinking too much? Regardless of which word we use, we are talking about constant thought loops that dont seem to have a resolution. People who overthink can be paralyzed by their worries and may struggle to make decisions or take action. 6. Before you make a call, write down what goals, priorities, or people in your life will be impacted. While you have good intentions to protect me from what you perceive as being dangerous, such as experiencing fear and rejection, it is helpful for me to experience these things to build effective coping skills. This is how you grow, emotionally and spiritually. Most of the time, people just say things without any hidden intention or desire to hurt you., Taking things too personally and getting hurt by words people say is a waste of time and energy., Follow on: FacebookTwitterPinterest InstagramLinkedin. The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. In one study, car buyers who used only careful analysis were ultimately happy with their purchases about a quarter of the time. Now they wont ever take me seriously again. Success journal. You must be aware that however much critical thinking you apply to a decision, you may be wrong. like facts: I am not a likable person because I dont like myself. As you start to recognize when your thinking may not be helpful or reflect reality, it can be helpful to talk to people you trust. Everyday experiences and relationships are inclusive of challenges, and I need to be able to manage and work through my uncomfortable thoughts and feelings about them. You just met The One or maybe a shady character. Some decisions are worth mulling over, while others are not. Acting, therefore, leads to clarity. A mind rests well at night knowing its day has been directed toward worthy goals. Digital Privacy Policy, Disclaimer & Terms of Use, Rehashing challenging or uncomfortable conversations, Fixating on things you can't control, change or improve, Imagining the worst-case scenario or outcome, Following your worries out of the present moment and into an unchangeable past or unforeseeable future, "Running your list" while trying to fall asleep, Questioning but never making a decision or taking action. "Studies show that ruminating on stressful events can, over time, lead to anxiety and depression," warns Dr. Fowler. I managed to collate a number of strategies for effectively reducing over-thinking. | Busying yourself with an activity is the best way to change the channel. Indecisiveness became expected. Stop being a perfectionist. We can't control or change some facets of life, just as we can't undo gravity. I get where you are coming from, but I also realize that what was purposeful in childhood doesnt always serve me well in adulthood. Overthinking is exactly what it means, thinking too much. When you overthink, you have a hard time getting your mind to focus on anything else. Its special because it, single-handedly, can induce the ultimate peace in people. Walking, swimming or exercising the body can take your mind off temporarily, from the habit overthinking. Trouble sleeping. This choice is put eloquently by the Dalai Lama, A common maxim in cognitive-behavioral therapy is, thoughts are not facts. It is so important to remember this because thoughts that we have about ourselves, our past, and our future can. An open letter to my overthinking self Journals June 3, 2020 I know what you feel, and I know what you are thinking. Especially at night, when I attempt to fall asleep and there are no distractions or ways of avoiding my thoughts, they surface whether I welcome them or not. (2018). If this happens often, you are what psychologists call a ruminator, or over-thinker. Once you learn to keep overthinking in check, youll be able to harness your sensitivity for the superpower that it can be. To me, that removes all the spice of life. When the prospect of falling flat on your face seizes you, think about how youll feel about the decision 10 weeks, 10 months, or 10 years from now? What is overthinking? Many cause nothing more than stress. - Napoleon Bonaparte. and "What are other possibilities?". "To think too much is a disease.". Serve first, seek second should be the motto for anyone currently distressed by their perceived problems. Co-rumination, anxiety, and maladaptive cognitive schemas: When friendship can hurt. As mentioned earlier, rumination is the word often used in research to refer to a repetitive and unproductive way of thinking about the past (Nolen-Hoeksema, 1991). It seems like the harder I try, the more difficult it is, and they just loop, spiral, and exacerbate. But dont say no one warned you! Being comfortable with being wrong, and knowing that your opinions and knowledge of a situation will change with time, brings a sense of true inner freedom and peace. Nurturing Secure Attachment: Building Healthy Relationships, A New Explanation for Why Some People Worry So Much, Do You Suffer From Emotional Pain or Anxiety? Understanding what overthinking is, why we do it, and learning how to stop it using some of the tips above could help you break free from patterns that are holding you back. This means their minds not only take in more information, but also process that information in a more complex way. Why Stress Is Good for You and How to Respond to It, Stop Feeling Frazzled: A Powerful Guide to Reducing Stress (and a Giveaway! It does not store any personal data. "Overthinking can affect how you experience and engage with the world around you preventing you from making important decisions, keeping you from enjoying the present moment and draining you of the energy you need to handle daily stressors," explains Dr. Fowler. "Take time to deliberate, but when the time for action has arrived, stop thinking and go in.". If you have read this far and have identified that you tend to overthink, you may be frustrated with yourself. It wont happen. Your protective nature is also the impetus for your tough-love strategies. Video: How to Stop Overthinking Everything. It wasnt just what I got done, but how I got it done, how quickly, and how I felt about it, he later told me, It put me in the best frame of mind to deal with whatever is in front of me, he said. Some are frivolous; some are life changing. For example, determine a date or time by which youll make a choice. Theyre probably onto something. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. As you embark on this journey, some of these books might continue to give you insight and inspiration: Overthinking is not just unhelpful, it can actively harm our well-being. Practicing concentration exercises enables you to control your thoughts and focus your mind on what you want to think, not on restless thinking and on ruminating. It is important to remember two things here. Look at the evidence of the situation to see if a thought is logical, reasonable, or helpful, Hafeez says.